Quick Tips: Five Fresh Starts for Living

Anita Agers-Brooks was kind enough to allow me to share her Five Fresh Starts for Living with you today. If life seems too overwhelming right now, just start with one of them and make it part of your life. Then add the next when you are ready.

In the past, she's shared on my blog about Beating the Winter Blues and Getting Through the Holidays When You Don't Want to Get Out of Bed.

Life Coach and International Speaker Anita Agers-Brooks is the author of many books including Getting Through What You Can't Get Over -- Barbour Publishing and First Hired, Last Fired -- How to Become Irreplaceable in Any Job Market -- Leafwood Publishers.

Questions for Anita? Leave them in the comment section below.

Christmas Vacation-- Do One Thing

Sometimes we feel we have to do it all. In fact, if you read articles, blog posts or books about all the things you should be doing with your children, it can be overwhelming. It's impossible to do it all!

It may not be as impossible as you think. You probably can it all, you just can't do it all at the same time.

So do one thing at a time.

With over a week left of Christmas vacation, you might be feeling pressured to accomplish many of those things we are told we as parents should do.

Well, I'm keeping it simple. Lots of at home projects. One reason is that my daughter is having a baby this coming week so plans have to be flexible for that. But also I know that trying to do it all will make for a stressed mom and kids. If it's not fun, why bother doing it?

Here are my ideas. It's an easy list really. Why not join us? Choose any seven and do one a day.

1. Read one book. We are reading an easy version of Peter Pan that we can read in one sitting. Then we are going to watch the movie. 

   

   We read books whenever possible in the evening. We have read Number the Stars, The Giver,  Call it Courage, The  Courage of Sarah Noble, Robin Hood, The Prince and the Pauper, Homer Price (part), Heidi ( a 1900s version), Behind the Bedroom Wall (WWII), Shades of Gray (Civil War), The Year of Miss Agnes and more. Last summer we read 100 picture books even though my children at home are 10, 10 and 14.

2. Do one puzzle.This is a puzzle that was my mom's in the 1930s. It does not have interlocking  pieces, so it's very easy to knock it all apart. Anyone seen these puzzles before? One child is very frustrated by this puzzle so we've told him we'll get out an interlocking one after we finish this one.
   
3. Memorize one verse. Our verses for 2015 are Matthew 5:14-16.  We memorized them last January. I would often tell the kids "glow in the dark." We decided that our verse for this coming year is Micah 6:8 No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good and this is what he requires of you:to do what is right, to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.
4. Walk one mile. We are going to walk at the park at least once next week.
5. Volunteer one hour. We are going to go to the shelter where we got Travis and Sasha and take some of the doggies on a field trip to a park. In the summer we take them kayaking. It's almost an hour away, so we don't get there very often. 
6. Try one new recipe. Haven't decided on this yet.
7. Make one craft. We have been doing loads of craft that you've seen in the past posts on this blog. We will be starting projects for our "Week of Kindness" (or maybe two weeks) we'll be doing in February. We actually plan to do many projects next week--splatter painting, almond bark pretzels, cards, watercolor, marshmallow snowmen, Reese cup owls, decorate pillows...but if we don't get them done, no worry!
8. Set one family goal. We decided that we are going to try and go tubing in NC this summer. We are planning the date, finances and travel agenda.
9. Write one letter. The kids are going to write to their penpals in SC. `
10. Play one game. We've been playing Escape, a new Wii game Ty has, and Skip It. Yesterday Jasmine managed to hit a Christmas ornament and send it flying.
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
11. Draw one picture (and give it to someone). The twins are practicing their drawing and then are going to draw a picture to send to their birth father in Haiti when a friend goes down there.
12. Start one new tradition. If you want an easy one, light sparklers on New Year's Eve and talk about how Jesus is the Light of the World, and have each child share how he/she will be a light in the coming year. Our new tradition is that we are going to do a Polar Bear Plunge Jan 1 an hour away. We will have to get up at 6 a.m.
13. Clean out closets and storage areas and donate one bag of stuff you no longer need to a thrift shop or local charity. We have been doing a lot of decluttering lately because I am making the family room much more welcoming!

These are just a few ideas. There are many more easy ways to make the most of Christmas vacation. 

Check back to see if we make it through our list, and let me know how you spend vacation.

Ten Ways to Rejuvenate When You're Stressed Out

We're just entering the winter months, and we have more sun here in the Florida panhandle than some of you do in your part of the country. But by time February rolls around, most of us are feeling the effects of winter--and being inside with children more than usual. 

Sometimes the issue is more complicated, for instance if you suffer from SAD, you might need one of the special lights you can buy or may even need medical help. 

Not only is there the winter thing, but parenting is a demanding job. If you are a single or temporarily single parent, this is even more true -- both for moms and dads. 

During this holiday season, it's easy to get stressed out and fail to enjoy the festivities or even to wish you didn't have to get out of bed.

Here are ten ways to help rejuvenate your energy and deal with the demands of parenting.

     1.  Hire a baby-sitter. Everyone needs time away from the children other than time spent at work. Don’t feel guilty about leaving the children with a baby sitter occasionally while you go to the gym or attend an adult activity. An alternative would be to have an older neighborhood child take the children outside to play while you spend time in the house doing what you wish to do.

    2.  Have fun. True, you have many responsibilities and it seems you will never get caught up. You still need time for fun either alone or as a family. This may be as simple as making popcorn and watching a movie, playing a board game or going to McDonald’s once a week. Turn the children loose in the play area while you have a cup of coffee. 

     3.  Have an emergency kit. Stock up on interesting items from the dollar store. Keep them in a special box under your bed and pull them out when the children are bored and irritable. Use them for rainy days and sick days.

     4.  Form or join support group. Look around for Mothers of Preschoolers (sorry, no dads), parent and tot groups, exercise groups, support groups adoptive parents or whatever you need. Don’t ignore your needs. As you meet your own needs, you will be more able to meet the needs of your children.

     5.  Let your children help. Don’t come home from work, try to fix supper, run a load of laundry, feed the dog, start the dish washer and gather dirty laundry and dishes from around the house. Delegate! Even the smallest children can help. Send one child to gather dirty clothes and dishes. Have another set the table. Older children can start the laundry and do dishes. Having a rule of no television before the work is done is great motivation for most children. A weekly allowance also spurs motivation.

     6.  Exercise. Perhaps you feel you don’t have enough energy left to exercise, but it will actually give you more energy and help you stay fit. If you are a working parent, use your lunch hour to walk with a friend or play racquetball with the guys. Use your breaks to stretch, walk around the building or up and down steps. If you are an at home parent, take your child for a fast-paced stroll around the neighborhood or work out with an aerobics DVD.

     7.  Practice good nutrition. We make our children eat healthy food but sometimes we don’t do the same. It’s easy to drop some change into the snack machine and get a Coke and Doritoes, but that’s not the healthiest choice. Sugar may boost your energy level quickly but good nutrition will pay off in the long run.

     8.  Keep a sense of humor. Sometimes you have to laugh or cry. Choose laughter. Studies have shown that it has many benefits to your emotional state and your well being. Look for the humor in even the most annoying situations, or look back later and laugh.

     9.  Learn something new. Don’t become a dull, lifeless person. If you don’t have a challenging job that keeps you sharp and learning, find a hobby that does. Take a community class in sign language, Chinese cooking or speaking German. It will make you a more interesting person.

    10.  Spend time alone with someone special. Go out to eat with your husband. Go to a movie with a friend. Go shopping with a sister. Do something fun or meaningful with someone you can share the memories with later. Everyone needs a break from children. You'll come back refreshed and ready to tackle parenting issues.

You can't do everything, so pick one thing from the above list and do it this week.

What do you do to rejuvenate?

Do One Thing

Back when I started this blog a few weeks ago I mentioned the importance of just doing one thing. If you follow Pinterest or craft and homemaking blogs, you've seen they are flooded with elaborate decorations, gifts, food and crafts to make for the holidays. What I figure is that the people who have time to do all that either run full speed night and day, have no life or just aren't human. 

For me, if I can't buy it at the dollar store, I don't need it. Okay, not really. But close. The best part of holidays is shared memories and time together. If those two things involve making crafts, decorating or cooking and baking, fine. But if it's not fun, then why do it? If every project turns into a family feud, you probably need to re evaluate those projects.

Don't try to do it all. You don't really need to make wrapping paper when you can get it at the dollar store. The packages don't have to look professionally wrapped. Use a gift bag (dollar store again) and save stress. 

If you want to bake cookies from scratch, help yourself. But it's easier to buy the ready-to-bake cookies and let the kids decorate them.

Don't try to do it all. Do one thing and have fun at it.

Which one can you do this week?

• Bake cookies and decorate them. Give half to someone else.
• Read a Thanksgiving or Christmas picture book--even if your kids are older.
• Build a nativity scene from graham crackers. (On my list to do)
• Make turkeys from cupcakes for place settings for Thanksgiving (see my girls blog HERE)

• Visit one elderly church or family member.
• Take one tag from one tree from the many places that have them each year--Walmart, Salvation army, churches, Angel Tree OR pack one shoe box.
• Attend one concert,  play or Christmas program (unless you have children in more than one).
• Drive around the community and see who has Christmas lights up already.
• Take a long walk in the crisp air or play outside. Last year we had Thanksgiving dinner on Thanksgiving Eve. So on Thanksgiving Day we grilled on the beach and played catch.

• Give everyone five slips of paper and have them write one thing they are thankful for on each one. Read them at Thanksgiving.
• Play a game.

• Light sparklers after dark and talk about how Jesus is the light of the world and how your family can share that light.

Starting and maintaining holiday traditions and having holiday spirit is good. But only when it draws you closer together as a family and benefits others.

What traditions do you have? What ones do you want to start?

It Starts with Labor

Motherhood: If it were going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor. Barbara Johnson

How true is that? Whether that labor is the physical toil of pushing a child out of your body or the emotionally draining work of home studies, background checks and an every shrinking band account, parenting starts with labor.

And it doesn't end when the child is born or arrives home. The work is just beginning. But remember this: Parenting isn't a sprint, it's a marathon. (Was James Dobson the one who said that?) We're told that we should read to our children, make the most of teachable moments, let them help with cooking and housework, check their homework, monitor their screen time, provide educational experiences, eat together as a family, take family vacations, keep scrapbooks or journals, attend PTO meetings, open houses, orientations and parent teacher conferences--or better yet, home school. And the list goes on. Thing is, you can't do all those things in the same day. So don't try. Do one thing. Just one. (I'm going to talk about doing one thing many more times on this blog!) That one thing a day adds up to 365 a year. So finger paint today and read a picture book tomorrow. 

(See what we read HERE) Go to a museum or botanical gardens today and start reading a classic aloud tomorrow. If you try to do it all at once, you'll go crazy. It's a short drive/walk for many of us.

So hang in there. And just do one thing today. What will it be?